Lincoln 33 Revol’s Per Minute
Bacon and eggs for breakfast; TV would be proud – not!
On to work and a couple of coaching sessions. One worked well and the other
rather interesting! That’s the thing about people they’re all different!
Picked TV up at a beautiful big old house in Long Eaton. The hard times of being on the road in the 21st Century! I bet TV wishes all his accommodation was so luxurious.
On the drive over we listened to the greatest album of all time. The happy, snappy sound of the Doctors Of Madness at the ‘Late Night Movies, All Night Brainstorms.’ “That’s me on backing vocals” claimed TV as the Doctors played the phenomenal Richard Strange song ‘Who Cries For Me,’ taken from the Doctors last ever concert in 1978.
TV told me about the time when The Adverts played Lincoln with The Damned on the 1 + 3 = 4 Chords Tour. The gig was besieged by a gang of skinheads. They ended up being blocked inside fighting off those that stormed the gates like revolutionary rebels without a cause. Needless to say that The Damned, The Adverts and their loyal faithful survived to fight another day! TV, of course lets his words win his battles these fighting these days. Wise man!
I phoned my best mate Smit, who was on his way to France, to stay with his friend I had met on Smit’s 40th birthday bash. I got a shock when Mike Mooorrreee (see Cambridge review) answered. Turns out he was going on holiday with Smit. The last time we went on holiday was, yet you guessed it, Smit’s 40th in Devon. Smit had booked a big old house in the country and we almost asked TV to provide the entertainment, but bottled it.
I went on to tell TV about my brother in law, Bean, and how his favourite saying back in ’77 was “Mi symbols fell off.” This was a quote from Laurie Driver at the end of the ‘One Chord Wonders’ B-side; ‘Quickstep’.
We eventually found the Bivouac, above the Duke Of Wellington on Broadgate. I dropped TV off and helped him in with his gear, at which point TV quipped, “thanks Tj the Tour Manager.”
I nipped up to my favourite Lincoln pub; The Victoria for a decent pint in splendid surroundings.
Shortly after I was getting ready for the last night of the TV & Tj mini tour at a guesthouse on Carholme Road. I threw out the black and donned khaki baggy combat pants and my new Khaki Manic's T-shirt, ready for the Revol!
Like all good revolutions I started off in Pizza Express. Quietly tucking in to a quarto firmargi and sun dried tomatoes (now Teev would definitely have approved of that). I overheard someone calling out my name. I decided to utilise my combat gear to merge into the background to avoid any unnecessary contact. Too late I was tapped on the shoulder by Smit’s sister-in-law. Guess what, yes her and her husband where the final couple to attend Smit’s 40th celebrations. THE WORLD JUST GOT SMALLER AGAIN! I finished my pizza in excellent company and talked them through my great adventure with the great explorer.
Let the adventure continue…
At the Duke of Wellington I met Alan once again and we ascended the seedy stairs wondering what delights were awaiting us. I gave my name at the door and they matched it with the guest list, which Alan either found impressive or anal (his favourite saying) you never can guess with Alan.
We were greeted by the Bivouac Camouflaged in netting hanging spectacularly On The Roof. “The guy who runs this place is so keen that he puts the camouflage up every day and then takes it down every night”, we looked round to find the headliner smiling. TV introduced us to Fred Owen, a fellow fan, who was at his first gig since The Adverts. We had a long chat with Fred about TV and The Adverts. Fred’s glowing complexion complemented his enthusiasm – this was a man who was really going to enjoy the gig.
Next up for grabs was Arturo Bassick; the Lurkers / 999 bass player. Arturo is mentioned in depth in my Ashton review. He also featured in the March 2000 Mojo Punk In London DVD review, right next to a pic of TV Smith and Howard Devoto. It reads “A chat with The Lurkers bassist player Arturo Bassick and his elderly parents is priceless, as is previously unseen footage of The Adverts.” Arturo told me how much he was always made to feel welcome in the Gaye TV household.
On came the support – a proper Punk skinhead three-piece unit. Images of TV’s previous gig in Lincoln flashed before me. I fought them back. The singer sported a Freddy Kruger jumper and the bass player was a Paul Simeonon look-a-like, wearing the appropriate revolutionary camouflaged combats pants.
TV took to the stage with No Time To Be 21 the first of half a dozen classics he blasted straight through.
A change of pace as TV slowed into; Roll Like a River, New ways Are Best and Strong Horse
Next up it’s Cheap thrills with Third Term and The Newshound.
After One Chord and Green Line I could resist no longer and bellowed out for Lies – TV promptly obliged.
Then it was time for the legendary band in a box who were introduced by TV saying “now it’s time to introduce the drummer – Oh no! mi symbols fell off,” “private joke!” he said to the confused onlookers.
Then the classics; Lion and Poor. TV offered us our ticket out of here – there were no takers!
“Swimming In The Flood” I roared. I knew I had struck gold when TV announced here is a song about crappy Jerry Springer type shows. TV said “I’ll never be like Jerry Springer – have you ever heard me ridicule anyone?”
TV followed up the box link with the appropriate Televisions Over. Fred went wild on hearing his favourite Adverts song.
The underrated My Place clocked up TV’s 21st track followed by the much debated Big Fish
The band returned for a quick explosive Tomahawk Cruise.
Gilmore, Teenagers and Gen Y followed – 26 bloody splendid infectious tunes could it get any better?
You bet! Time for two of my personal new fav’s – I Know What You Want and The Future Used To Be Better.
Back with the guys with the symbols for a quick finale. Song 29 is Happy Homeland, then a dose of speed through Sugar Crash and The World Just Got Smaller Again. 31 songs! TV is really going for it tonight.
“Play No Time To Be 21 again,” shouted one of the moshers at the front “Were you at the Leeds gig” retorted TV “Have you dyed your hair?” This time TV didn’t give in.
With all this camouflage we ought to have some bombs - “leapfrog over fences” chanted the Bombsite Boy.
Track 33 – yes 33! What could TV possibly finish off with? “This is a song about a trainload of nuclear waste…” With all these momentous changes in the world even TV like some predictability! Hit the maximum applause button on the clapometer.
After the applause died down TV began selling his CD’s. One guy picked up his cassette recorder from the stage (he’d been taping the gig – I wondered how I could get a copy.) If you’re reading this mate send me an email.
Alan, Fred and I all agreed it had been a fantastic gig. 33 songs - It felt like a never-ending story!
Fred and I took photos of TV, Arturo and a mohecan punk (who I ended up having a good chat with about those amazing Punk days.)
Alan gave me a lift back to the guesthouse – Cheers mate!
That’s it! The end of TV & Tj’s mini, 5 gig, 2001 tour. On to 2002 – We Who Wait!